


a dance of morality in a person who has none

by alonelyghost



Series: the kids arent alright [2]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: Angst, Blood, Blood and Gore, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, akechi really hates blood but really romanticizes it, and gets a little weird dark, dont read if ur like not too great with blood, i'll be real with you this fic says the word blood a lot, idk it's 2am and i was sad, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-04
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2020-01-04 15:43:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18346688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alonelyghost/pseuds/alonelyghost
Summary: The Phantom Thieves find a distinction between the demonic shadows and those born out of the hearts and minds of real people. The Phantom Thieves do not kill, do not do lasting damage, too stuck on some moral high-ground to realize that the line they have drawn for themselves only holds them back. The Phantom Thieves are impossibly pure, frustrating in their savior attitudes, annoyingly naïve to the realities of the world around them. They irritate him to no end.Why, then, does he find himself longing to have their lives?





	a dance of morality in a person who has none

**Author's Note:**

> i accidentally posted this in persona 3 for like a solid hour like an idiot oh my god

In the absence of blood, stark against trembling skin, dripping thickly down from open wounds, Akechi disconnects himself from the horrors he is committing. There are no wounds, no slumped body, no wide-eyed horror as a living, breathing human being begs so helplessly for their life. There is only darkness and insanity, flesh disintegrating easily into dust, the click of a gun that cannot be shot elsewhere. It is darkly satisfying, to take his anger out on something, consequences forgotten in the rage he holds back so well now channeled into something productive.

Of course, he doesn't always kill them. Often it is insanity that he gifts them, no matter how temporary. It is the breaking of a mind, the guilt of their actions, actions performed in a haze that they no longer remember. This, too, is satisfying in a way it should not be, as he watches the news cover the most recent consequence of his actions. He can't be bothered with consequences. Or, perhaps, the part of him that's bothered by his work is the bit he pushed down long ago in favor of his all-consuming need for revenge.

The absence of blood, dark red and unsettling, is what helps Akechi convince himself that he is doing that which is right, no matter how selfish his definition of “right” is. Without blood, without the evidence, none of the crimes will ever be traced back to him, and if he need not worry about being caught, why would he worry about the act at all? The Metaverse is his own little secret, that which he can hold over his father's head, an ability only he possesses.

Until it's not.

The Phantom Thieves find a distinction between the demonic shadows and those born out of the hearts and minds of real people. The Phantom Thieves do not kill, do not do lasting damage, too stuck on some moral high-ground to realize that the line they have drawn for themselves only holds them back. The Phantom Thieves are impossibly pure, frustrating in their savior attitudes, annoyingly naïve to the realities of the world around them. They irritate him to no end.

Why, then, does he find himself longing to have their lives?

It is a longing he pushes down with the part of him that worries about morality. It does not befit a murderer – and that is what he is, isn't it? – to worry about friendships or his twisted sense of right and wrong. He will gain nothing from dwelling on what could have been, because what could have been is not what happened. He can't afford to waste time on pity and longing. No, he has a mission to complete, and he will stop at nothing to finish it.

The absence of blood is comforting in a way it shouldn't be, his own cowardice coming to fruition as he sighs in relief every time the blood doesn't come. He can convince himself that this is a necessary evil, anyone would do the same, as long as the blood doesn't come. It is easier to watch shadows die than it is to watch real people. He learned that long ago.

( _The Phantom Thieves wouldn't do the same_ , his conscience tells him.)

( _Shut up_ , he replies.)

He is fine as long as he works in the Metaverse, where no one can catch him, where no one knows who he is. He is fine as long as he kills in the Metaverse, where he doesn't have to see what happens to the victim in front of him, where he is not forced to watch as someone takes their dying breath. He is fine in the Metaverse, killing and driving to insanity until -

The Phantom Thieves fuck everything up.

The Phantom Thieves _always fuck everything up_.

Everything is going according to plan until he is forced to befriend the Phantom Thieves, blackmail them, lead them on a predetermined course they don't know about. He will not like having to kill them, but he will do it to gain his chance at revenge. They are simply pawns, it is laughably easy to get them in his clutches, quickly on their way to being caught and dying mysterious deaths with his help. It's easy until – until -

There is a bug on Akechi's phone and scars on Akira's arms, and everything is going wrong. There is a bug on his phone and the Phantom Thieves look at him with betrayal in their eyes, as if he chose this. As if he had their trust to lose in the first place. They have hated him from the start, and they are looking at him as if he has betrayed them.

( _You have_ , his conscience helpfully supplies.)

( _You can't betray trust you don't have_ , he shoots back.)

He is not supposed to know about the bug, he knows, and he is not supposed to see the betrayal in their eyes. Perhaps, because this newest mission is one that will force him to confront all he has fallen to, he pretends he doesn't. He says nothing. Nothing to Shido, nothing to the Phantom Thieves, nothing to stop his mission or theirs. He says nothing as he passes Sae in the hall, nothing as he enters and kills the guard – he looks away when he sees blood – and nothing as he faces down Akira. He doesn't know what the plan is, how it could be possible to get out of this situation, but he plays his part. For dramatics, or perhaps to stall as long as possible as he works up the nerve, he recites a speech.

Insanity-driven smile.

(Blank look.)

Gun raised.

(Grey eyes, dull with drugs that have yet to clear fully.)

Click.

( _Blood. Blood. Blood. Blood._ )

He makes the call.

“The leader of the Phantom Thieves is dead.”

**Author's Note:**

> hi my name is katlyn and i only write angst im sorry


End file.
